Sunday, January 08, 2006

Motivation

Hello again. I admit my blogs are wordy. I'll try and keep it short. I've felt busy since the New Year, but I can't say I feel like I'm actually accomplishing much of anything. I guess I'm still in the phase where I'm trying not to turn down invitations, so I go to birthday parties, I go out and play ping-pong or pool, I go out for coffee, and I go to people's houses for lunch. Most of the time, it's pleasurable. Sometimes, when I realize just how differently I view the world, it feels like work.
When it comes to actual work, I'm still having my language lessons, and I'm banging my head up against the wall at the clubhouse - that makes it all feel better, trust me. I've been thinking a lot about the "Educational Center" that my organization is drooling to create. I'm right there with them. I'll probably be talking a lot about this project. We have this fairly large space that we would like to divide up into rooms for computer usage, meetings, classes, and maybe a library or something. We're still figuring out exactly what this "Educational Center" will contain. That's where the community comes in. And we've turned to the young people who volunteer in the club for ideas. Problem is, many of them say they'll show up and they don't. Getting ideas out of them is sometimes like pulling teeth. Transitioning ideas into acts is seemingly insurmountable. One of the boys said it'd be great to have an English club, and all I could do was look at Angel for a long moment and then laugh. What?!?! He's one who says that he wants to learn English with me, but he doesn't come to the classes. He's a bright boy with so much potential. They all are. Problem is: many of them want things handed to them on a silver platter. They don't see how much work goes into these things, or, when they do see it, they decide they really don't want to bother after all. "Oh yeah, yeah. I'll do that. Wait, you mean I actually have to DO something? Oh, nevermind." So here's my question: Where is that cosmic leap between wanting something and actually taking the necessary steps to acheive that something? Can someone help me with that? Where does motivation come in so strong that you actually get up, figure out what needs to be done, and do it? The last time I remember putting plans into action was when I was applying to Peace Corps - and what a process that was. It took me two years+ to get here, but here I am... banging my head up against the wall. I applied for this? Yes. Believe it or not, I'm still living my current dream... even though that dream currently frustrates me every other day - but still I'm here because of motivation - because this is just another step I'm taking to get to a place I want to be... and I'm not even sure where that is. I'm going to go bang my head against a wall now. Ciao.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey it is me...just had time to read one blog. I don't have any idea how to answer your question...all I can say is if it bugs you in your sleep, you wake up thinking about it first or you just feel very passionate about it then go for it. Take charge! It took you two years true...but your in Bulgaria while the rest of us probably still just talk about what they want to do. I have faith in you!
Love ya,
Christi

Fuzzmaster said...

Sometimes you have to tackle things like you would getting out of bed in the morning (especially when it's toasty under the covers and freezing everywhere else). This is an exceptionally difficult task and we all have different techniques:

Some, burst forth from the covers allowing the shock to smack them silly (and awake)...

Others slide out a solitary toe, then two, a foot, a leg, an arm, etc...

Still others, stay under the covers entirely and slowly inch their way towards the edge of the bed until a leg or arm flops over the edge and it's weight drives them to the floor...

Finally there are those who lay half unconcious in denial of the coming sun until the pestering squeal of an annoying alarm clock drives them to it...

We each have a different method or driving force behind our actions, resolve, and motivation; the trick is to find out what type of person(s) you are dealing with (Perhaps a getting out of bed poll) and plan accordingly.

The only type of person that you can't help are the ones who don't ever get out of bed.